And in that moment
i was glad i was not the controller of time…
Because i knew
that selfishly i would have played that moment
over and over again
Never letting the world run out of time.



Is there another side of the glass
Or is my reflection really my own

Am I supposed to be happy
Or was I born to feel alone

The badlands have caught me
Or maybe I have just found my home



I have two different sides. Can’t you see my teeth?
She comes out and then resides like the tide.
I can’t let her win.
Sometimes I can calm her, shaking and scared but she doesn’t like to abide.
You probably haven’t seen her because she likes to hide.
I hate her.
We are like black and white stripes.
Imprisoned on the same white page.
But her convincing me being black, like her, is normal.


Like the stars we live in darkness, yet have our own fire to light the darkness up.

I think so many things are misunderstood in this world. The blaming before the truth. The power before the trust and the conviction before the pain. It’s all wrong, everything is. And its sad i seem to be the only one who notices.

Maybe it’s just because I speak with the stars. Or maybe it’s because I listen back.

They all live in the night. Darkness doesn’t have to be bad. The world has turned all good into evil. The stars never did a thing wrong, yet they die.

Just because we live in darkness doesn’t mean we are.


Excerpt from Color On Me


I wish I lived in a movie
Where I knew the plot would end
I would be able to choose my story
And no one would no who I really am

I wish I could find my prince charming
and live happily ever after
where I hold a script telling me what to say
always knowing what to expect in the next chapter

I would not be scared of anything
all my fears would be behind makeup
But Instead I live in the real world
And thinking about it now I could only
cut ….



I put it all behind me and now I feel so empty

I’m afraid that those thoughts will never haunt me again

Is it bad that I don’t think I will ever truly want to understand

Though there will always be a little beauty in self betrayal and treason


What you all want to know about me

1. I cry a lot..
But I also smile a lot

2. I’m a very messy artist and cook but I have to keep my room clean

3. I hate how I manipulate people sometimes but i’m getting better

4. I’ve seen a therapist and I’ve learned that its ok to know that you are broken

5. My body isn’t as healthy as I want it to be but its my home

6. God has never left me

7. I write not to remember the past but to forget it

8. I am the worst speller on the planet

9. I listen to music way to loud

10. I was supposed to be born in the 50s

11. It took me way to long to write this

Maybe decide today to tell someone 11 real things about you.

Better Than

In the moment of silence between a butterflies wings in motion
In the space between the seconds that we don’t speak of
Maybe there is something much better then this broken love
We all hate change even though we know there might be things better above

Fear is the one holding you and somehow that is better than being free and yet alone



I put my finger on your lips

To hush you from yourself

It’s a scary place to run away from Because you have nowhere to go

But baby remember you’ll always Have me

And I’m sorry if that’s a bad thing to Know

At least I can whisper counteractions Oo your mind

And When I start to break down

You will be the force reminding me to Grow



He Loved me for a little while before he decided he was done with me
He set me aside like an old book on a bookshelf wishing its spine wasn’t so dusty