Trees

My mind is about to explode
I’m only a sapling yet you treat me like a grown tree
You can’t base everything on what you see
They say I’m mature for my age
But they don’t ask me why
I guess it’s easy to get lost in a forest when I’m alone
I’m trying to be a tree but I can’t change reality
I think I’ve convinced you though
And I think I’ve convinced myself to a slight degree

M.A.P

 ©

Spring

Why am I scared of of something that comes every year
New beginnings and terrestrial endings
I wish it was an irrational fear

Beautiful colors drenched in distractions
Was there any peace in the world giving birth here
Can I appreciate the flowering and budding
Can I become fresh and perennial
I guess everyone sees the raindrops and all I see is the tears
What do I do when I’m finally happy and no one else is
Spring you were just our beautiful veneer

M.A.P

 ©

Romance

Romance

Romance knocked on the door last night

I closed it saying you’re not real

Lust came and slept with me

Nothing felt right anymore

Love climbed through the window

I told him the fake thing was cheaper

As i turned i kissed infatuation

i could not let him go

Fear wrapped around me

I felt sickly warm

Emotion threw me to the ground and beat me

Passion and zeal eloped that night

Without saying goodbye

They left me standing next to my old friend hate

And even when he left I still wasn’t alone

I knew i would never truly be alone

Even when i wanted to be

The loneliness never leaves

M.A.P

©

Soft Healing

Soft Healing

I woke up today and realized I haven’t harmed myself in over a year

I have been softly healing without even realizing it

I haven’t cried about my body in months

I ran my fingers over my body and loved it

Ashamed I used to cover it with my hand

I looked at my nose in the mirror and became proud of it

M.A.P

Checklist

Checklist

Family was never a dream for her

It was just something to check of her checklist

If you throw away the puzzle

I’m the piece without a purpose

I know this was your plan all along

So was it worth it?

Throwing away 20 years of your life

Because you never thought he deserved it

M.A.P

Broken People

Broken People

Us broken people have the urge to mend anything around us broken

But a broken person can only put someone else back together as much as they are whole

You need to fix yourself before you can truly help others

Believe me, I would know

It’s better to break her heart then ruin her soul

M.A.P

Wasn’t

Wasn’t

I wasn’t made to be pretty

I wasn’t made to blend in

I wasn’t made to just watch silently

I wasn’t made to be happy

I wasn’t made to be young

I wasn’t made to ignore the weight of the world

I was made to use my tongue

M.A.P

©

Why I Write

Why I Write

People ask why I write so much

As if it is a sin

I say, “I write to remember”.

Because they will really never understand

The truth is I write to forget

Like vodka spewing from my lips

It burns coming up but flows onto the page with such bliss

So I choke it out

and all that is left is the black stains on my fingertips

and pages of lost memories because I write to forget

M.A.P

©